Kuroko's Facebook
by Nayoko'sai'ry
Summary: Our charming basketball playeurs on Facebook. Translation of my original story. Come here if you're curious !
1. Chapter 1

The characters aren't mine. I borrow them just to turn them to ridiculous XD

It's an idea I had on the monday morning during the maths lesson …

I hope you'll spend good time reading this

This is a translation of my original story. I apologize for the mistakes you'll met in this text.

Kuroko no Facebook.

 _Momoi you identified into status, you and 5 others people._

 **"** **Kuroko Tetsuya** **\- So unobtrusive that he could penetrate all places.**

 **Aomine Daiki** **\- An outsized talent, you should see in every hole … should see all the colors**...

 **Akashi Seijuro** **\- The only one who can using real scissors as a sex-toy … It cuts attention !**

 **Midorima Shintaro** **\- It is always right to shot, and "pan" Shutoku ! ***

 **Murasakibara Atsuchi** **\- A big and limitless appetite, it will last !**

 **Kise Ryota** **\- He can reproducing all positions ! ''**

 _Momoi commented a status which you appear._

Momoi Satsuki - **Wonders, is the case to say it, that's the "Kiseki no sedai" !**

Kuroko Tetsuya - **Momoi-san !** _[ 6 people like your comment ]_

 _Midorima and others have commented on the status which you appear._

Midorima Shintaro - **Momoi !** _[ 6 likes ]_

Aomine Daiki - **Satsuki !** _[ 6 likes ]_

Murasakibara Atsuchi - **Momo-chin ...** _[ 6 likes ]_

Kise Ryota - **Momoicchi** _[ 6 likes ]_

Akashi Seijuro - **Momoi ...** [ 6 likes ]

Momoi Satsuki - **He's always there Nigou, for those leaning zoophile ...**

Kuroko Tetsuya - **No.**

Momoi Satsuki - **Oh ? You volunteered to dress up and take his place ?**

Kuroko Tetsuya - **No.**

Momoi Satsuki - **What pities ... Oh, Dai-chan you do all sink ** ...**

Aomine Daiki - **Eh ?!**

Momoi Satsuki - **Don't play innocent ...**

Aomine Daiki - **Oi, Momoi you go too far ...**

Akashi Seijuro - **Oh ? You hide something from me ?**

Momoi Satsuki - **Akashi You didn't know ?**

Aomine Daiki - **But stop telling bullshit !**

Midorima Shintaro - **Look, This is a first, Takao isn't invading my notifications.** _[1 like ]_

Momoi Satsuki **\- The other day … in the locker room c: ... Oh,** **Midorima** **! :D .** _[ 1 like ]_

Aomine Daiki - **?**

Kuroko Tetsuya - **I have one for** **Kagami-kun ...** _[ 2 likes ]_

Kise Ryota - **Eeh ?! Momoicchi ! What is that ?! :,C Aominecchi ! me too ! I saw you in the locker room ! I was with Momoicchi that time ...** _[ 2 likes ]_

Murasakibara Atsuchi - **Yes, I have a big appetite Momoi-chin, that isn't a revelation ... Mine-chin I was there too, and I see you're did a things with your right hand.** _[ 2 likes ]_

Momoi Satsuki - **What idea Tetsu-kun ? Tell me ! Tell me ! Tell me ! These sentences are just observation about all of you C: ... Ah you see Dai-chan !**

Kagami Taiga - **What I have doing here?**

Aomine Daiki - **... You will stop your bullshit ?! I just reading my magazines ... Oi, Tetsu' , pull back your words !** _[ 1 j'aime ]_

Kuroko Tetsuya - **Kagami-kun = Always jumps higher and back down more faster and more stronger ... He always pushes its limits.** _[ 4 j'aimes ]_

Midorima Shintaro - **Aomine, you did « that » in the locker room ? ...**

Kise Ryota - **Ah ah ! Well done Kurokocchi** _[ 1 j'aime ]_

Kagami Taiga - **… In training, I will kill you ...**

Aomine Daiki - **LOL ! Great this one Tetsu' ! But now saves your ass … I DID NOTHING IN THE LOCKER ROOM, SHIT !**

Akashi Seijuro - **Oh ...**

Murasakibara Atsuchi - **Aka-chin, If I tell you what he did, am I have the rights to get a few chips in another time ?**

Aomine Daiki - **Ass licking ...**

Kagami Taiga - **How suddenly quiet O_O**

Midorima Shintaro - **Bakagami -_-**

Kise Ryota - **Bakagami -**

Kuroko Tetsuya - **Bakagami ._.**

Aomine Daiki - **Bakagami XD**

Murasakibara Atsuchi - **Bakagami '-'**

Akashi Seijuro - **I have to come here for learn that Daiki masturbates in the locker room after some practice where he's participate, that Momoi gives free way to her yaoi need here, that Tetsuya develops a little sense of humor ... You are all become suicidal ? *scissors* I have with me …**

Aomine Daiki - **...**

Kuroko Tetsuya - **...**

Momoi Satsuki - **Ah ah ! You are discovered Dai-chan ! And it's not humor, they're all facts !**

Midorima Shintaro - **Hum, Kuroko and Aomine made a suspension point contest ?**

Murasakibara Atsuchi - **Oh ! That would be fun, I participate : ...**

* - - French joke. Pronounced at the french « Shutoku » It's look like this « shoot au cul » and in english : « Shot in the ass » … It's hard to explain my bad joke sorry XD

** → Here … It maybe didn't make any sense but on my sheet, I spent a hand on the ink which I used to write his sentences And suddenly it sank and I was everywhere cover of ink XD

This is the end of … this thing ? XD

Reviews ? :3


	2. Chapter 2

Here you go the translation of the second chapter !

Again my bad joke are here !

enjoy #

 **Kuroko no facebook 2**

 _" Kuroko Tetsuya is worried - :s_ **...** _"_

 _Momoi Satsuki and other people had comment your statut._

 **Momoi Satsuki** \- Eh ?! What's happened to you Tetsu-kun ?!

 **Riko Aida** \- Me too I'm worried Kuroko ... :c It's not regular ...

 **Mitobe Rinnosuke** \- ...

 **Hyuga Junpei** \- Worried ?! I will say shocked, yeah ! _[ 4 likes ]_

 **Kyoshi Teppei** \- Oh ! Please don't be like that, it's more a good things, isn't it ?

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- You think it's serious ? I mean, really serious...? Midorima -kun you think it's serious ? Your parents are doctors, aren't they?

 **Momoi Satsuki** \- What's happen here ?!

 **Shinji Koganei** \- We don't need a doctor, be realistic! we need a shaman :3 ... _[ 5 likes ]_

 **Midorima Shintaro** \- If I don't know what's happen, I can't help you Kuroko ...

 **Riko Aida** \- A doctor will be a good start, for sure ...

 **Hyuga Junpei** \- An exorciste will be most good, I'm sure of that ...

 **Shinji Koganei** \- We can always try voodoo practices :3

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- Practices to cults often require the sacrifice of the subject with fire ... I can't allow this ...

 **Momoi Satsuki** \- Eeeeh ! Answer me !  Aomine \- Dai-chan ! You know what's happen here or not? D:

 **Shinji Koganei** \- so much for that … Voodoo I will always love you !

 **Riko Aida** \- We would not even burn him anyway ... 3:)

 **Hyuga Junpei** \- Or not ... 3:) * go away *

 **Kyoshi Teppei** \- Oh ! Let's call a shaman and have fun~ ! Kuroko doesn't want to use voodoo.

 **Aomine Daiki** \- nope, i don't know more than you Satsuki ...

 **Momoi Satsuki** \- Ah ... What a pity, I had hope that you know more about this ... it's so frustrating :c

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** → We need to know what's happened to him with a peaceful way to proceed. Thanks...

 **Koki Furihata** \- We can also play the shaman, it avoids paying one ...

 **Hyuga Junpei** \- Hum ... in this case, we can call the firemen ...

 **Riko Aida** → No, be serious guys ... A medic should be fine, except ... No, his situation is too serious to be tested by a simple doctor ...

 **Shinji Koganei** → Let's hurry to find an answer while is not here !

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- I think I have an idea ...

 **Aomine Daiki** \- And thanks to whom, eh C: ? _[ 1 j'aime ]_

 **Momoi Satsuki** \- Dai-chan ! Explain to me !

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- Yes, it's true, you are right, thank you Aomine-kun. _[ 1 j'aime ]_

 **Aomine Daiki** \- Sorry Satsuki, but I made a promise at Tetsu. I'll not say anything, in fact, if you keep follow this, you'll have all your answers.

 **Momoi Satsuki** \- Oooh ! That's not fair, so I fallow it :D !

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- ultimately, no require to find a doctor ... but after what I plan to do, I think we need one...

 **Riko Aida** \- An idea combined by those two, I wonder what is it.

 **Hyuga Junpei** \- As long as it helps us to uncover the mystery K - T - H - A - G – R.

 **Shinji Koganei** \- It's been a while since it should be connected … So strange

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- He is comming ... He finished later than expected ... Ah, here it is !

 **Midorima Shintaro** \- Between here and Takao ... It's hopeless, my astrological sign is really not in a good light today ...

 **Kagami Taïga** \- Oi ! Kuroko ! What's up ? I'm late because of my bus stuck in traffic , don't worry about me for such a little things ... i know that i'm always on facebook but stay calm when I'm not ...

 **Shinji Koganei** \- Kagami are you sure everything is ok ?

 **Hyuga Junpei** \- Although with the comment he just posted, he seems to come back to himself.

 **Kagami Taïga** \- What's all those comments? And what is this « mystery K - T - H - A - G – R »?

 **Momoi Satsuki** \- Oh, I get it, you're horrible XD

 **Aomine Daiki** **-** You see , I told you that you'll understand by yourself.

 **Kyoshi Teppei** **-** K - T - H - A - G – R = Kagami Taïga Had A Good Rating !

 **Hyuga Junpei -** I leave it to you kuroko, the explnation … all of this !

 **Riko Aida** **-** «Captain" you're a coward... I will finish your training programs !

 **Shinji Koganei** \- Duty calls me ...

 **Kagami Taïga** \- ...

 **Aomine Daiki** \- I thought he will be more responsive XD **!** _[ 1 j'aime ]_

 **Riko Aida** \- it shouldn't be long ... 3 ... 2 ... 1 ~ _[ 3 j'aimes ]_

 **Kagami Taïga** \- Are you seriously ... Go to the hell, all of you! U_U

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- Kagami-kun ?

 **Kagami Taïga** \- Are you with them Kuroko ?! D:

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- Kagami-kun ? ...

 **Kagami Taïga** \- BASTARD ! D:

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- ...

 **Kagami Taïga** \- Yes ? Sorry, my comments was sent with a time of retard ... Tell me they dragged you in this story by force ..

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- No, I'm really worried about you, I think you should speak with someone ...

 **Kagami Taïga** \- That support ... I didn't kill someone ! we're not going to make a big deal of it ...

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- I'm always with you Kagami-kun :) _[ 1 j'aime ]_

 **Kagami Taïga** \- How can you say it in this way ? It sound so serious ...Honestly ... it's being creepy ...

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- But you get the best result of all the classes in the exam ... It's very strange, so I'm worried about your health ...

 **Kagami Taïga** \- Kuroko ...

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- What ? Are you going to tell me?

 **Kagami Taïga** \- Fuck you, no, all of you !

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- XD

 **Kagami Taïga** \- I can't believe it, you're kidding me … you too ...

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- Yes, I can't believe it, but it was funny , yes verry funny sorry kagami-kun ... _[ 8 j'aimes ]_

 **Kagami Taïga** \- OMG ... Go fuck yourself bitch ...

 **Riko Aida** \- Eh ! It's ok ! No need for medical examination ! The subject becomes his self again! _[ 4 j'aimes ]_

 **Hyuga Junpei** \- Indeed, but it remains strange, what was your idea Kuroko?

 **Kuroko Tetsuya** \- Nigou can help us to find the truth ...

All the chapters have a continuity between them.

If you have any ideas don't hesitate to tell me and I will write on it, and also couples you liked well;)


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